Bad luck definitely exists. And we will all experience bouts of bad luck, for sure. The question is, what is bad luck? It’s a question I have pondered long and hard, from my own point of view and also that of my clients. As a professional intuitive consultant, I have been asked many times “Why am I so unlucky?” and “When is my luck going to change?” The problem is, luck is an emotive subject – and one which often requires further scrutiny. 

Anyway, I’m going to tell you a little story that inspired me to write this post. Very recently, my partner and I were heading out on our motorcycle trike for an afternoon ride-out. As we rode into a small, quiet village, we passed two young women sitting at the side of the road, surrounded by bags and camping equipment – with an obviously broken down car a few feet away. One of the girls was sobbing, whilst the other was clearly trying to comfort her. Concerned, we turned around and pulled up alongside them to see if we could help in any way. Immediately, the upset young lady leapt to her feet, and, through her tears, she rapidly explained that bad things were always happening to her. She had nothing but bad luck. She didn’t understand why and she didn’t know what she’d done to deserve it. We managed to establish that the fuel tank on her car had suddenly fallen off – hence why the stricken vehicle was sitting in a pool of petrol. The friend looked perplexed but also resigned to the situation – as if she’d been through this kind of thing before. 

It emerged that they were returning from a festival and were around an hour from home. “I went to have a good time – to just enjoy myself”, the weeping girl said. “But then this happened. It’s always me, I always have bad luck.” We discovered that the driver’s mother had recently added her to her own breakdown policy and that the recovery vehicle was on its way. The police were going to attend to clear up the spillage, and so there was nothing we could do to help – it was all under control. I gently advised the devastated young woman not to continue to tell herself that she was unlucky and that bad things always happen to her, and her friend readily agreed. However, we all know that when we’re feeling overwhelmed by life it’s difficult to see things in a more positive light. She was genuinely grateful that we’d stopped to check on them and waved us off like long-lost friends. “Ahh, what a shame,” we both said, feeling genuinely sorry to see another person so unhappy.

As we tootled along, I thought a lot about what had just happened and wondered if there were any positives to be found in the situation. Sometimes, there is literally nothing to salvage from a negative occurrence, no matter how hard we try. However, I came up with five facts for which she could have been grateful (and may well be when she’s in a position to reflect upon it):

1) If the petrol tank had fallen off 30 minutes later, she would have been on the motorway – and the outcome would have been very, very different. The positive is that it decided to part company with the car at the edge of a quiet village.

2) Her mother had had the foresight to ensure that she was covered for breakdown recovery. The positive is that she didn’t have to try to find someone willing to tow the vehicle home, which would have been difficult on a Sunday, and also very expensive (so, a double positive).

3) The breakdown occurred on the way home from the festival – the positive being that she’d at least gotten to have the fun weekend she’d wanted.

4) It was, as her friend said as a way of cheering her up, a dry, sunny day (not a common occurrence around here, recently!). The positive being that the weather was a bit friendlier than usual. 

5) She wasn’t alone. The positive being that she had the company and support of someone who cared about her.

I don’t believe that I’ve scraped the barrel to come up with this list of positives – I believe that they are all valid points. But it depends upon our perspective. If I’d been on my own and hadn’t had plans, I would have sat with them until the breakdown vehicle arrived. I’d have encouraged her to talk and share her story, to assess if there was any way I could help her. It might be that her problems genuinely were huge and dire – or it might be that her sense of perspective was skewed, leading her to erroneously believe that fate was singling her out for one piece of bad luck after another. 

As I said earlier, bad luck absolutely does exist. And by bad luck I mean the kind of situations that leave you shaken and stunned. I have met people who have experienced the most awful, unjust circumstances, and have been humbled by how they’ve managed to keep going. I remain haunted by reports I have heard or read about, of horrors that have been inflicted on other human beings – and all I can do is pray for them. I don’t know why some human souls are victims of this and neither does anyone else, regardless of our theories.

However, there is another form of bad luck – what I would call ‘normal’, everyday bad luck that we all experience from time to time. This involves us going through a phase in which everything seems to go wrong, from minor accidents, delays, broken down equipment, cancellations, and the loss of a purse or credit card, to name but a few. These miserable phases always pass and we need to guard against elongating them by buying into victim mentality. No good can come of it.

It is also important to recognise when our circumstances are playing a role in how lucky or unlucky we appear to be. People who are surviving on little money for lengthy periods of time are unluckier than people who are better off (I know because I’ve experienced both). And it is easy to see why. Those who are financially broke have nothing to fall back upon, no safety net. For example, for years the cars that I drove habitually broke down. At a family gathering, following another vehicular disaster (from which I was spectacularly and unexpectedly rescued), I was telling a man how lucky I was because I was always bailed out, one way or another. He stared at me as if I was crazy. “Lucky?” he sneered. “I would say that you are the unluckiest person I know, where cars are concerned!” I was taken aback by his response… but he was wrong. It wasn’t bad luck – it was bad finances. I could only ever afford to buy old knackered cars – and old knackered cars tend to break down more than newer models do.  

Which brings me to how bad luck can be the consequence of poor choices. People who have consistently made poor choices often don’t want to accept responsibility, preferring to blame the cruelty and injustice of fate. This can apply to romantic relationships, finances, health, and business. It might be that we’ve been raised in an environment in which we’ve been consistently exposed to resentment toward those who are doing well. It could be that the messages we received in our formative years produced negative programming. We might just be naive, or impulsive, or prone to ignoring red flags. Where this kind of ‘bad’ luck is concerned, we can change our perception. We can recognise that we are the common denominator here and see our luck change, as a result. 

I have always been lucky, and I don’t say this smugly. I have nothing to be smug about. Despite having led myself into struggle and hardship and relationships that presented problem after problem, I was blessed to meet some amazing people. I have been rescued time after time, often against the odds. However, it’s very likely that my good luck would have run out eventually, if I hadn’t taken conscious action to improve my circumstances.

The purpose of this post is to help you understand the complexity of the subject of luck. There is still so much more I could say, but, hopefully, I have provided enough food for thought to encourage you not to unnecessarily injure your life with the misguided belief that you are an unlucky person. It’s possible that you could be… but it’s probable that you aren’t. And one last thing I can’t finish this post without mentioning: some of the biggest shifts in my life have come about following a period of darkness, of one body blow after another. Which is why it is important to hang on to a glimmer of faith. This too shall pass. 

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