I don’t enjoy it when people want to use the services of a medium to continue family feuds, or to have their own behaviour validated… and yes, that does happen!
I remember the woman who wanted to know exactly what her deceased mother now felt about her sister, because surely she could see her in her true colours, from the ‘spirit world’? I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the mother – even death wasn’t enough to escape the rivalry between her warring daughters!
Where’s the money??
And people have wanted to know where certain possessions have disappeared off to, following a loved one’s death. Arguments over things like jewellery and money are not uncommon, with demands being made of the deceased to reveal who stole the thing that another family member believes should be theirs.
Then there is the transference of personal feelings and bitterness onto ‘spirit’. I overheard a conversation once (well, when I say overheard, ear-wigging is probably a more accurate description!) in which a woman informed her friend that she had been told by spirit that an uncle who had recently died would have to come back and make amends for all of his wrong-doings. It was expressed more dramatically than that, but that was the general gist of it. She was bristling with indignation and righteousness, and I am sure that the said uncle was a real piece of work… but was she really confided in by some loose-lipped entity, or was she projecting her own wishes for him onto an invisible force, so that she didn’t have to own her own anger?
You just can’t trust angels…
And here is something that really made me laugh recently, although it didn’t start off as funny! A woman, who I just sensed was going to be a bit tricky, paid for and received her online, predictive consultation. And very shortly afterwards she emailed me to tell me how unhappy she was with it, and that she wanted a refund. She didn’t explain much, except to say that she didn’t like it. Now, I have a no-refund policy for completed and delivered consultations, which is clearly displayed on my website’s consultations page, especially if it is prediction that is being disagreed with – for very obvious reasons! I reminded her of that, but suggested that she go through Paypal for a refund if she was so unhappy… and she told me that she couldn’t, because she paid by credit card, and not through Paypal. I told her that, as I received the payment through Paypal, she could… and also, that if she didn’t want to do that, she could always apply to claim it back through her credit card company (see, I was being very helpful!). She still wasn’t happy and insisted she had not paid me through Paypal, still demanding a refund, and so I looked at my account and there it was, of course… her payment. We went backward and forward, and then came the bit that made me laugh: she said, ‘well, just ask your angels or whoever it is you get your messages from how I paid, and they will tell you that I used a credit card’ (a fact that I wasn’t actually disputing). What, those very angels who provided me with predictions and insight that you say you don’t like and don’t want to pay for? Now you expect them to tell the truth? That doesn’t sound right to me! It almost made the whole time-and-energy-wasting experience worthwhile! However, the confusing thing is, I don’t actually claim to receive predictions or insight from angels, spirits, guides or whoever else… and my approach is made very clear on my website’s ‘How I Work’ page. If I am communicating with a specific deceased person, connected to the customer, then I consider that to be a spiritual connection and I explain what I am seeing, feeling and hearing. When I am producing a general predictive consultation, I am relying on my own God-given (something we all have) skills, developed over many years. And so, if I suddenly somehow lose the plot and produce something incredibly nonsensical, I don’t see why the angels should have to carry the can. Having said that, it could be a handy way of passing the buck: when a customer likes and appreciates their consultation, it is all my own work; when they don’t, it’s those pesky angels again, messing things up. Put in a claim against them, that’s my advice. In the end, just to get rid of the ongoing hassle, which included being informed that the bad things people say about me on psychic forums are true (why do angry customers always do that – it is so predictable?) and despite the fact that I had put all of the usual time, energy and effort into the consultation, I did refund the payment… from my Paypal account (you know, the one she didn’t pay through). But I won’t be making a habit of it, and have just reinforced my refunds policy. I myself might not enjoy the taste of something I purchase in a supermarket, or agree with the contents of a book I read, or appreciate how my dentist handles my teeth… it doesn’t mean I am automatically entitled to a refund. (For more on this subject, see my blog, THE ‘THREAT’ OF BAD REVIEWS ON PSYCHIC FORUMS!)
I know you’re dead, but…
I don’t think that deceased people care about who-did-what-to-whom, and even if they did, what are they supposed to do about it? I understand that when someone dies, the hurt they may have caused others isn’t just forgotten by the grieving; the mother whose daughter wanted her to see her sibling in a negative way probably played her part in the upset, maybe consistently favouring one child over the other. The yearning to hear her mother admit that she had been wrong wasn’t an adult response – it was the reaction of a hurt, angry inner-child. I am really wary about becoming drawn in to such situations, and let’s face it, I could say anything that I believe the customer wants to hear: “your mother can now see that your sister is a manipulative, dishonest soul, and she is so sorry that she couldn’t see it when she was alive. She has disowned her and wants you to know that you were always the good one.” I could say that, but even if I did hear and sense it, I wouldn’t feel good at all about delivering it… it wouldn’t be coming from a healthy, loving place.
I don’t really think too much about my own deceased relatives, about where they are and what they are doing; we lived very separate, disconnected lives, and I don’t feel any need to be in contact. I don’t harbour any feelings of ill-will, more a sense of detachment. However, I am fascinated by the journey that is death-life-death and so on, and I will continue to explore all aspects of it until I myself leave this world, I imagine. Arguing with the living is draining enough, never mind entering into conflict with the ‘dead’! There are plenty of inspirational souls I will be keen to connect with… if, that is, they can spare me the time from their busy, non-physical-world schedules!