Just hearing the term ‘law of attraction’ is enough to make most of us groan, having had it thrust down our throats and held over our heads, for years now. There was a time when it was the new big thing, the latest get-rich-quick-trick, THE answer to all of our frustrated hopes and desires… but only if we could figure out how to do it right. And as the initial excitement of ‘The Secret’ died down, I came across hundreds of disappointed, disheartened individuals who were still skint, still struggling, still yearning, despite endless hours of visualisation and repeated affirmations. I heard, ‘It’s all just rubbish’, and ‘What am I doing wrong?’, and ‘How long does this actually take to work?’, again and again. And I have to be honest: I was one of those people, spouting that stuff!
But, despite the knowledge that I was dragging myself forward one millimetre at a time, rather than the miles I was hoping for, I still believed that the concept was sound, and made perfect sense. I experienced periodic little miracles in my life that defied rational, logical explanation… occurrences that bailed me out just when I really needed it the most, but with the least hope of reprieve. Or that’s is how it appeared to me, anyway. Looking back, I recognise that I was making headway; I had made an unconscious deal with the great force of life that it would save me when I was most desperate. Somehow, I allowed that, whilst not allowing anything more than that. I could be saved, but not nurtured or ‘spoiled’. Survival was something I could accept. Thriving easily was not.
I have been on this journey for sooo long, but finally I am seeing things in ways I couldn’t see them, even a year ago. I understood stuff intellectually, and I could talk about it… but I was still struggling to feel it. I started to recognise the difference between what I knew in my head, and what I could honestly, truly feel, comfortably, in my inner world – in my ‘heart brain’ (which I imagine is in the centre of my chest, because that is where I feel the most!). I have spoken with thousands of individuals who have bitterly sworn that they are doing everything right, that they are doing all the required work… that they have no problem whatsoever accepting opportunity, abundance, money… but yet it continues to evade them. They are convinced that the law of attraction works for others, but not for them. And sadly, I realised that I couldn’t help them. The big things in life can never be taught – they can only be learned. We can educate ourselves, we can take direction, and we can pick up tips and hints… but how we perceive and absorb it, and how we utilise it, is always down to us, in our own individual way.
However, I CAN say that if we truly understand that desire for something alone is not enough, and that step by step action HAS to be present, for as long as it takes, then we will experience results! We will be seeing that the law of attraction works through us, and with us, not to us. We can tell our mind over and over that we are attracting a million pounds, but because it only works with facts, with what it already knows and understands, it is likely to say, “F**k off! You have been struggling to pay your bills for years… scraping by, hanging on by the skin of your teeth! We can do this stuff with our eyes closed – let’s not go rocking any boats, trying to change things, now. Anyway, you wouldn’t even know HOW to handle a million pounds, believe me… I know you, remember!” I think that many of us have probably viewed the law of attraction as an alternative to real, persistent action, backed up by a developing sense of connection with what it is we genuinely, truly intend to achieve. And the word ‘intend’ is key here; intention has power behind it… hope does not, and neither does desire, if they are standing alone.
Additionally, a dose of reality is required…
I have been asked, on a number of occasions, if an ex partner can be compelled to return, via the use of the law of attraction. And in every case there has been heartache, dysfunction, and unresolved conflict. The law of attraction is not a magic wand, I am afraid. It operates productively through high energy, not misery, resentment and fear. That is a fact that I, myself, have really had to make peace with – that I have to operate from a healthier, clearer mindset, first and foremost. And then I have to be willing to be clear about what I am setting out to achieve, applying real intention, coupled with consistent, persistent steps… and a degree of realistic expectation! I can visualise myself as a winning Formula 1 driver until the sun implodes and planet Earth turns to dust, but it is never going to happen, and for very specific reasons! Even where the law of attraction is concerned, a little common sense goes a long way!
We also need to actually resonate with whatever it is we are saying we want to receive and achieve. I have been training myself to think bigger and richer… to break down the deep-seated divides that exist within my mind. For example, I make sure I no longer negatively judge lottery winners, as in “Huh, look at her! She clearly hasn’t even heard of the law of attraction, and yet she’s won millions! She doesn’t even take care of herself, or keep herself fit. WHY God? Can’t you HEAR me??”. Sounds bloody dreadful, doesn’t it, but I have to be honest… I have had those kind thoughts in the past! Ridiculous. The bottom line is, some people just don’t have the money blocks that I have had. It isn’t their fault, and my blocks are not their problem. And recently I made myself read ‘posh’ home and garden type magazines, without tutting every other second at outrageous prices, whilst secretly feeling lesser than the kind of people who can easily afford to buy that stuff. I wanted to be able to enjoy it without judgement, and to a small degree I did. However, I suddenly recognised that a good portion of my discomfort comes from the fact that I don’t really value soft furnishings and such like. They don’t float my boat or ring my bell. The idea of spending £3,000 on an occasional table meant absolutely nothing to me… I couldn’t ‘feel’ it. But I COULD feel aligned to the idea spending the same amount of money on a motorbike, or a trip to a Grand Prix. And whilst at a Grand Prix, I wouldn’t have any desire to be dressed up to the nines, hobnobbing with the celebs… I’d be as near as possible to the pit lanes, drinking in the scent of fuel and burning rubber! Our goals have to be absolutely meaningful to us, and we have to keep working on ourselves until we genuinely feel worthy of them. And we need to be able to recognise the difference between what our inner self really feels and believes, and what our outer self says, remembering to seek out ways of consistently and positively aligning them. The physical/metaphysical Universe is one tough cookie, and operates along very definite lines. It cuts itself no slack, and as we are a part of it, born out of it, it cuts us no slack either. I reckon its motto is: Pee or get off the pot!