Having a vagina helps, but there is more to being a woman than that!
I am not into girl – power or sisterhood. I do not see myself as a goddess, and I have never described my daughters as princesses. I have to have something more in common with another woman, other than the fact that we both have a vagina, in order to have any desire to join forces with her. HOWEVER, I DO believe that women have a genuine capacity to achieve so much, given our wiring……and without the assistance of a high – heeled, pseudo – macho attitude, or excessive self – sacrifice. Who can forget Helen Hunt, in What Women Want…….I fell in love with her character, and was completely on her side, every inch of the way!
What actually helps us is that we still have so much to prove…….a fact that can be the very wind that gets behind us and pushes us on! And our background matters less than our attitude, and our attitude is everything! I know of an organisation in which the largely female workforce consistently sit around gossiping, failing to apply themselves to their work, bitching about whoever isn’t in the room or on shift, and reporting their colleagues to the management. These would never be my ‘sisters’, even though we are of the same gender. The attitude is shabby, and the bar is set so incredibly low that even a snake would struggle to slither under it! Ladies…..it is time to rebel against such mediocrity!
Women are wired to do several things at once……men aren’t! That doesn’t make us smarter, but it gives us an advantage, IF we see it that way! Yes, it is true that we often end up taking on other people’s duties, but look how much we can grow, as a result! I am not talking about being down – trodden and put upon. That is not definitely not a good place to be in, for anyone of either gender. And I am not suggesting we should run ourselves into the ground. What I am saying is that we can be great role models to our children and to other women, by walking the walk, and going the extra distance. WHO wants to be wasting precious energy and time constantly living within our own familiarity zone, when there are so many things we really want to become and do and make happen? WHO has the time or the will to sit around gossiping and bitching and complaining? Not you or I!
It is true that at different stages in our life, we face different challenges and pressures. The circumstances of a mother with young children is different to those of a middle-aged women whose kids have grown up. But that doesn’t mean both women can’t grow and achieve, in their own way! There is no lower limit, and no cut off point. And money is not the big decider it is often deemed to be, either. The most valuable currency is enthusiasm, mixed with curiosity, warmth of heart, humour, imagination and determination. Oh, and a pen, and paper to write upon, THE list of intended achievements, some of which are small and easy to make happen, and some of which are huge and are going to take time and effort.
So, wherever you are at in life, remember that it can only ever be a temporary phase, and that tomorrow is always built upon today. Everything productive you do counts. You are influencing those around you through your attitude and actions far more than you may realise, and you WILL see results, woven into the fabric of life, as time passes by. You, as a woman, are a potential power – house who does what she does for results, and for the greater good of yourself and those around you, and not for approval or acknowledgement. Make that list today, and include your biggest and best dreams. Date it, make a copy, and give it to a trusted friend. Keep your own list with you, re – reading it again and again, and check in with the friend at certain intervals, so she knows you are still on the case, and discuss your progression!
My own list is pretty chunky, and I have set some big career and financial goals. I have no idea exactly HOW I am going to achieve them, but I work daily, not just for an income, but also to market myself, and to expand my reach, my horizons. And I am still working on developing myself, still learning, and then sharing that learning, as others have shared with me. And I found this great quote from the wonderful, inspirational Coco Chanel……and she should know, she was both!